Rogue
by KarlaCharmed
Summary: Andrea, daughter of a Charmed One, has lived a double life, her destiny and her morality. However, after a series of tragic events including the apparent death of her boyfriend, Andrea decides to flee in hopes of finding answers and finding herself.
1. Goodbye

**ROGUE**

**CHAPTER ONE: GoodBye**

I was always told that I was special, that this thing, this burden that I had been born with was a gift. Apparently I would learn to appreciate it, eventually. Well, eventually hasn't come for eighteen years, so screw eventually. I spent so much of my childhood leading a double life that it plunged me deep within a black hole of inner conflict, struggling to swim to the surface before another dark, unforgiving wave engulfed me. Unable to explore and find myself, I had grown distant from all I was. No longer would I accept the stranger in the mirror; it was time to find out who she was. It was time to end my duplicitous destiny, so I broke out, I ran away.

**[---]**

The dimly lit halls began to flood with hormone crazed teenagers, chaos and noise bursting in my ears as their diet of Red Bull and fast food gave them a temporary case of ADD. Their sneaker's screeched and yelped like animals in pain as they raced along the vinyl floor. She shut her locker door, pressed her books against her chest and sighed.

"Damn, kids. I'm only a senior and already I feel senile..." she moaned.

I smiled awkwardly as I realised now could be my last chance to tell her I was leaving, that I might not see her again for a long time.

"So, anyway, I was thinking we could catch a movie this Friday? We haven't been out in a while," she suggested.

"Yeah, I don't know about that, Jules, "

"Or we can always just chill at my place? You know, watch movies, talk and eat our weight in junk food. I know the perfect horror—"

"Listen, Jules. I just wanted to warn you, I'm not going to be around much longer," I interrupted.

"Why, you got a 'doctor's appointment'," she joked as we slowly made our way down the hall.

"Not exactly, Jules. I have to, ehm, stay with my Aunt Carol. Yeah, she's really sick and lives alone, and I was volunteered to help. So, I don't know if I'll be around for the rest of the term."

"I thought your Aunts lived here, in San Francisco?"

"She's from my Dad's side of the family."

"I didn't know you had any Aunts on your Dad's side?"

"Yeah, it's a distant relative sort of situation. Listen, I'm really sorry. I'll call you as often as I can."

I held her for a moment, my dear friend of many years, and quickly made my exit from the building.

"Andie, wait! You're leaving now? Talk to me for..." her words slowly faded into the ambience.

I couldn't look back; I was struggling to fight the tears without having to see her lost, confused expression. I hated seeing her upset, especially when I was the one causing the hurt. Never having spent more than a few days apart, I would miss her, but I knew she would be safer without me. This was a journey I had to take alone.

I made my way around the side of the building, passed the parking lot and the football fields. I stood beneath several oak trees, their amber leaves shading me from view. I tightened the straps of my bag around my shoulders and shut my eyes. I focused on my breathing, muting surrounding sounds and distractions, slowing down my heart rate, preparing myself. An emerald flame slowly began to form beneath my feet, smothering them before it engulfed me rapidly and I vanished from school grounds.

**[---]**

"Whoa, head rush!" I exclaimed as I flashed dizzily into my room in the Halliwell Manor.

I fell, with great exaggeration, onto my bed in order to rest and regain my vision after the nauseating trip. As the room slowly began to steady its self and come into focus, I sat up and stared at my surroundings. My cream walls that were carpeted in posters and picture frames of fond memories, the delicate rays of light that crept into the room through my sheer drapes and the incessantly cold hardwood floors that matched the furniture surrounding me were home comforts I would miss when I left. My attention, as always, was drawn to a particular photograph that stood idly in a pure silver frame upon my bedside table. I picked it up and traced the delicately engraved flowers with my fingers, before I gently stroked the glass sheet before the photograph inside; a precious memory, probably the most precious of all. A mascara polluted teardrop slowly slid down my cheek before it fell onto the glass sheet of the frame, distorting the image beneath. The lonesome tear was soon joined by several black tinted drops as I fell victim to my emotions, unable to prevent the penetrating signs of sadness.

"You really thought you could get away that easily?" asked a voice resonating from behind me.

"Jules, you shouldn't be here."

I knew it was her. She had spent many years perfecting the art of sneaking in and out of the Halliwell Manor on the many occasions I was grounded. I turned around to see the window open, Jules resting on its ledge. Without a sound, she slipped through the window and onto the brown bean bag beside my bed.

"I had a feeling this might have something to do with him," she sighed as she glanced at the photograph in my hands.

I looked down at the photograph once more; a summer's day spent climbing an oak tree by the football field. I was hanging from a thick branch, swinging back and forth as I figured out my next step in trying to climb down. He was gazing at me with those captivating eyes, ready to act on any mishap I may have, ready to catch me if I fell, ready to save me. If only I could have saved him. I threw the photograph back on the bedside table and lay back in my bed before my emotions could surface again.

"Andie, you have got to stop beating yourself up about this. Those demons were super strong; there is nothing you could have done, even if you were right there when it happened."

Her attempts at consolation were unsuccessful. Many times I had run through the events of that day and many times I had come up with hundreds of ways I could have changed the outcome.

"So, where are you really going?" she questioned.

I didn't answer. I simply stared blankly at the ceiling, counting sheep in my head, until she began to drum her fingers along the bedpost and play air-drums on her legs, anything to get my attention. She would irritate me half to death if it meant getting an answer.

"I need to get away," I responded eventually.

"And where exactly will you go, Crazy? Live in a box by a downtown dumpster? You've been like this for over a year now, so distant and empty. Why don't you just talk? It could help. What could you possibly find out there, on your own?"

"Answers," I replied as I swiftly jumped off the bed and grabbed my bag off the floor. I emptied the school supplies within and began to restock it with clean clothes, a first aid kit, magic supplies and magic books from my chest of drawers and the photograph.

"I am not letting you leave, Andie," she insisted as she stood up and snatched the bag from my hands.

"What do you need answers for? What do you want to find?" she continued to grill me on the matter.

"I need to find me!" I screamed, instantly regretting it. She released the bag from her clutches as I placed my hand on her shoulder, but she pulled away, her face cold and unforgiving. My eyes filled with tears as I struggled to explain.

"I don't know who I am anymore, Jules. All my life I had this secret to hide, a secret that I kept from you, from everyone for so many years. For as long as I can remember I was hiding part of me, because it was supposed to help people, my gift was supposed to do good. It tore me apart, and it was all for nothing! Chace died because of me, because I couldn't use my gift to save him. I don't know what I am supposed to do, but I cannot go on living like none of this happened. I need to find myself; I need to find a way to keep going."

"Andie, we have been through this before. Finding answers to Chace's disappearance, his death, is not going to magically unlock your soul or save you from this. You need to find a better way. I can't keep trying to help you if you insist on living in this morbidity, this depression."

"Then let me go!" I roared.

I surrendered to the emotions I had kept locked up in the darkest part of me for so long, I could feel them surging through my limbs, in my blood and my veins, energizing every fibre of my being. My eyes flinched and blinked rapidly as a surge of heat raced to my palms. Emerald sparks began to fly from my hands, forming two spheres of raw power. My mouth hung open in shock, my body began to shake as my emotions unleashed a power I had never used before, a power so strong I couldn't control it any longer. The emerald spheres had engulfed my hands and against my will erupted in a rapid succession of energy balls, catapulting towards Julie. She screamed as she was forced across the room and crashing into my mirror. The spheres quickly evaporated, the destruction they caused, however, did not. Julie lay motionless on my floor. I stood, breathing heavily, in shock, unable to believe what I had just caused. I could hear footsteps storming up the stairs and the room began to spin, blurring my vision, my thoughts, clouding my judgement. Everything was moving so quickly, my pulse rapidly increasing. I was lost, confused, scared, so I ran. Without further hesitation, I grabbed my bag and flashed away from the trauma, away from the pain, away from my life.

**[---]**

Alright, that is it for Chapter One. I know it was kind of short, but it's just this one don't worry. Hope you guys enjoyed it. Other chapters should be up shortly if school and exams don't get in the way too much. Please leave a review/comment etc. Thanks, dudes!


	2. Run

**ROGUE**

**CHAPTER TWO: Run**

I exploded into a run, frantically searching for safety. My heart was racing, pounding against my ribs so hard I was afraid they would snap. Fear and panic were causing me to hyperventilate; the lack of oxygen having detrimental effects on my ability to think. As I heard the storm of footsteps approaching rapidly from behind, I sprinted around the corner and hid behind a large doorframe at the entrance of an apartment block. I shut my eyes and focused all my energy on flashing out. The animal like snarls and growls the swarm of demons generated broke my concentration, forcing me into another twisted round of Cat and Mouse. I raced across the street, dodging cars, dodging demons, dodging death.

**[---]**

I was gasping for air, trying to catch my breath after leaping from behind a burning tree to one that was yet to be set alight by the demons' fireballs. I was enraged and struggling to create an energy ball strong enough to send the demons down into the depths of oblivion. However, as the law of conservation stood strong I instead tried to convert my emotions into energy, failing miserably once again. Fireballs now incessantly igniting and propelling towards me, I ran. Helplessly sprinting across the dew soaked grass, I could see my surroundings quickly being destroyed, the landscape becoming littered with scorch marks. A burst of heat shot into my arm, spreading rapidly throughout the rest of my body, forcing me to the ground. I yelled in agony as my arm began to sting and burn, my body temperature reaching excruciating levels I felt as if I was mere moments from combustion. Although the demons were fast approaching, I refused to surrender. I ripped the black cotton sleeve off my top and quickly bandaged my arm. Ensuring a tight knot, I pulled the DIY bandage with my teeth and left hand before slowly rising to my feet. It was too late. By the time I had stood up and stabled myself, I was surrounded. Death seemed inevitable.

"Any last words, Witch?" snarled one of the demons.

The demons prepared their attack, unaware that behind them a cluster of lights appeared. The dim lights faded quickly. Seconds later a demon exploded into pieces. Potion bottles sped through the air towards the demons as I dropped to the floor, taking cover. Roars, combustions, kicks and groans were all I could hear, my eyes were shut, fingers locked above my head, trying to shield myself as much as possible.

"Andrea, what the hell are you doing?!" a familiar voice called out.

The park was silent. The battle was over. I unlocked my fingers, brushed down my hair and rose to my feet. Standing before me were two women, two sisters. They were both dressed conservatively, one had her hair pulled up in a bun, the other let hers hang a few inches down her back. They both stood, arms crossed, eyebrows raised, faces scowling; Piper and Phoebe Halliwell, more alike than they would care to admit.

"It's called taking cover..." I responded.

"Not that, _this_," yelled Phoebe as she pointed to the piles of dust and scorch marks surrounding us.

"They came after me! I didn't go looking for them. I did not want to be found."

"What is wrong with you? You've been leaving a trail of destruction behind you all day."

Phoebe stared at me waiting for a response, Piper stood silent, arms still crossed.

"You think I like this?"

Phoebe and Piper glanced at each other briefly before Piper replied,

"Eh, yeah!"

I hated them. Always so righteous, so patronising, so god damn charmed. I was raging, frustrated by the day before, dreading the one now beginning and this conversation was only adding fuel to the fire.

"I'm leaving." I stated.

"Drop the rebel act, Phoebe's done enough of that for one lifetime."

"Amen to that," joked Phoebe smiling at Piper, but her smile quickly faded as she approached me,

"Sweetie, you have got to stop. You're just going to end up hurting yourself."

Phoebe took a few steps towards me, noticing my wound, she reached out to me, but I refused to let her touch me. I knew their game well. First she would be concerned, then sympathetic, while Piper still played bad cop, condemning my actions. Slowly they would try and convince me to go home, back to the manor where they would magically make everything better, quite literally. Play time was over. I did not want to play games anymore. I was going Rogue. I was on a mission. As Phoebe reached out once again, I grabbed her wrist and threw her arm into the air, throwing her off balance. I kicked her in the back of her knee causing it to bend, and as planned, she fell to the ground, giving me time to run.

"Ha, I told you not to teach her that..." Piper snorted in the distance.

**[---] **

"Come on, Andie. You can do this. She is your best friend. Your _best friend!_" I said to myself.

I took a deep breath and shook my hands vigorously before pressing them to my face. Taking another deep breath, I started down the hall, the all too familiar hall. My sneakers screeched as they moved along the clean vinyl floor, my body began shaking as I became fully aware of how truly cold these halls were. I examined the faces I passed by, worried, grief-stricken and painful faces. I never understood how a place of healing could hold so much pain.

"Room E27."

I took another deep breath before slowly reaching for the steel handle and opening the door. The room was empty. Empty of life, empty of emotion, empty of any signs that the vibrant girl I know was even lying here in the bed before me. My mind was flooded with memories, pictures of Julie laughing and smiling. I shut the open window and drew the curtains before I walked towards her bed and examined the bouquet of flowers upon the table. I removed the sunflowers that stood prominently in the middle, throwing them in the trash. I took the flowers to the bathroom in Julie's private room and changed the water. After I placed the flowers back, I admired their beauty, how their pastel colours complimented each other so beautifully. I reached for one of the flowers and placed it behind Julie's ear. I sat down in the chair beside her bed and slowly brushed the hair from her face.

"I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. I just couldn't control it, I didn't know what was happening. I would never hurt you. You're my family Jules. I am so sorry."

I don't know if she could hear me, I don't know if I believe she could, but all I could seem to do is talk. I occasionally noticed the minutes that ticked by on the clock across the room, but I kept talking, pouring my heart out to the one person I always could. A few more minutes passed before there was a knock on the door.

"Hi, sorry to interrupt, I'm Ms. Stanton's Doctor, Doctor Barnes."

"Andie."

He smiled, reached for the chart at the foot of the bed and began filling it in. He was young and cute. Julie would have loved him.

"You should keep talking to her. It may not be proven, but I always believed it helps. Coma patients have often woken before me after heartfelt confessions."

I glared at him. Although his intentions were good, he was wrong.

"You really shouldn't do that," I replied.

"Do what?"

"Give people false hope."

"I wasn't—"

"You're a doctor. Stick to science. Don't try comforting me with optimistic opinions or hope. She may or may not wake up, no matter what you believe helps. Sometimes people just don't wake up."

"I see. I can tell you've lost someone close to you before. It's understandable to--"

"Who are you, ? Get out of here!" I screamed.

He quickly placed the chart back and exited the room. I could hear him shuffle down the hall, his white coat rustling as it grazed his legs. Suddenly his footsteps stopped and began to move back towards the room. I got up and moved to the door. As the footsteps got closer, I could hear him talking to someone.

"Julie Stanton, you are her second visitor today, Mrs. Halliwell. Right this way."

I panicked. I tried to flash out, but couldn't act under pressure. I ran to the closet in the corner of the room and squeezed in beside Julie's clothes. I wrapped my fingers around the edge of the door and pulled it closed, however, my foot stopped it from shutting all the way.

"Here we are. Oh, our visitor is gone. Well, you just missed—"

"Andie," I saw Piper slowly move towards Julie. She fixed the blanket, pulling it over her arms before kissing her forehead. She was a born mother.

"Yes, Andie. How did you know?" enquired the Doctor.

"Whenever Andie was sick her Mother would pick daisies for her, and place one behind her ear. They're her favourite flower. Andie put one behind Julie's ear."

"I see. Well, I'll leave you with Ms. Stanton."

"No, it's alright. I have to get back to work now, I just wanted to check in during lunch. Thank you, Doctor."

I emerged from the closet. I quickly wiped the black tears from cheek. I looked at Julie one more time and smiled.

"Goodbye."


End file.
